Friday, September 19


As I was ranting, they want to know when the little ones arrive. Specifically Alex and my little ones.

1. The Reality Check/Environmental Standpoint
Do you realize how many people there are on this planet? We are procreating ourselves to kingdom come, and the Earth is screaming for mercy. Um, like, hello, it's melting? People are dying of hunger and thirst, two-thirds of the globe is water, Angelina Jolie and Hollywood lead the baby boom... is this sustainable? Will we have enough leaves of grass left to feed the world? Do you want to bring up a kid in a world where everyone is connected to an IV bag because this is the final solution?

2. Statistically Speaking
There are more women born then men. Women take care of procreation. The more women get born, the more potential babies are made. Read Number 1 again.

3. The Social Standpoint:
Personally, I can barely stand 3/4 of society. I'm not the only one, the number of chop-chop jobs, murders, rapes and various other imaginative forms of torture keep making themselves seen and heard - proof positive that we don't really like each other. And the population is growing. Are we helping each other hate more of each other?

4. The Financial Future:
The moment you have a child, that's it. Oh, it's roses and daisies and posies and sunshine. It's also buying milk and nappies and Gerber and saving up for the education and having to buy Polly Pocket collectibles, and educational flash cards and Dora the Explorer DVDs, and the lunch money and the spring break money and the money for the prom dress and the money for the wedding and the money for bail and the money, and the money, and the money. And what do you get from being a parent? Shoved in a nursing home, waiting for death. Is this really worth the joy?

You know, maybe this whole gay phenomenon is nature's way of surviving. She knows we're popping out too many babies, so she's making sure that some people at least won't procreate. But the gays can be greedy because they want kids too. And the whole darned cycle begins anew.