Headline Porn

And now for a dose of reality: this is a rather old one (courtesy of Chuck) but I thought I'd throw it in the merry mix.

Your Highness

Spoiler alert: much fawning and general incoherence ahead.

Spent the better part of Monday in the theater with Abby, drooling over Ben Barnes and his incredible close-up scenes. The Chronicles of Narnia is an incredible series of books (no, I don't have them... yet - if you do, I will accept handouts, thank you) and I read them when i was very young. I barely remember details anymore; I only remember thinking they were so much fun and being impatient to read every one. Yes, the story itself fell by the wayside, because I was too busy focusing on the prince. Personally, there were way too many reminders of the LOTR series, so it's just as well.

Granted, I suppose they could've just picked any good-looking guy to be Prince Caspian, but I'm glad they picked him if only so we could indulge in a few hours of giggling and elbowing each other in the ribs. Man candy!

I've had a crush on him since Stardust - he only spent probably five minutes or so in that movie, but it was enough. I think it's the hair. Abby and I unanimously agreed he is the younger McDreamy. The hair is something. If he cuts the hair, my crush might die. Then again, it might not.

Yay, Prince Caspian! I'm stoked - according to Abby (who is wired to IMDB and is a veritable film stalker) his royal highness is appearing in the third Narnia movie, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader. More Ben Barnes!

Life Cycles

So the journey starts, and we start the coasting along - kids on a beginner unicycle with Mom and Pop on either side, human balancers. We find other people to unicycle with, and unscrew Mom and Pop. Sometimes it's easy; sometime it isn't. It all depends on the country that manufactured the unicycle's balancers. At the end of the day though, the balancers have to go. And then we wobble along, slowly, a little unsurely, the freedom almost overwhelming, picking up speed, exulting.

It can't always be bicycles (somewhere along the way we all switch to a bicycle) and butterflies and wonderful smooth roads. College happens, the road gets bumpy, the terrain changes and you realize you need more than a unicycle. Enter the mountain bike, built for offroads, rough races, ten-speeds. It's no-nonsense. Means business. Gets you over life's mountains and the valleys and the plains, and the unexplainable ditches in between.

Maybe the scenery is breathtaking when we first pass it by; maybe it's amazing and unforgettable. Inevitably, as with everything, monotony sets in. It's dull; it's boring. It's everyday. Worst of all, it's exhausting. Sometimes we all just get off our mountain bikes, stare at the scenery, and try not to think about the whole rat race. Some forsake the mountain bikes and throw themselves off cliffs. Some decide not to bike at all. Most of us bike along listlessly, churning.

This is where we realize it's better to share the biking - could the dual-bicycle work? Can it be better than just being all by ourselves? We throw ourselves on the dual-bicycle; eagerly looking for partners, each one better than the last. We ourselves are the same victims of our own crafting; victims of the dual-bicyle partnering system. Cast aside, rejected. Always looking for someone else to pedal with into the sunset.

Sometimes we win, and find the perfect partner and we all pedal off into the sunset of our lives. Sometimes we don't, and we pedal off, ultimately alone. Sometimes we make do, and find our friends to end the race with.

Growing up is a lonely, scary trip down a road that goes ever on and on, with the final destination being death. No one wants to walk that road alone. Not really.

Joy

Sometimes happiness is a 30-minute drive with the wind in your face. For good measure, add plenty of good, heart-thumping music. Throw Paulie the crazy queen in the backseat, doing her signature dance move, effectively squashing poor Ellice - who doesn't know whether to laugh, cry, or jump out the window. Get Dean to drive, and put Aileen in the front seat.

Sometimes happiness is a 30-minute drive with the wind in your face, no care in the world, and a good dose of soul-clearing laughter.

Booksmut 2.0

There were too many treasures at the Booksale jaunt, so I just have to share. This one's for Chucky, and whoever can, uh, relate. "Shaping the man inside." How can you resist?! Don't front, girlfriend! You know you wanna.

The Birth of Booksmut

I haven't found much by way of Headline Porn lately. It's all about killing, drive-by shootings, gang rape and the cost of rice - Ang Playboy is nowhere to be found. It was horrible. The utter lack of inspiration. I was drowning in a morass of hopelessness.

There is light at the end of the tunnel! Through serendipitous chance, Miss Paulie and I were browsing through Booksale at Robinson's Center, and look what I found:

The sheer wonder of it all. People make too much out of not judging a book by it's cover. The cover sells the book! Underneath the plain-Jane facade lies a simmering font of sin and desire! You know you're lining up to buy this hot mess. Girl on girl action out the wazoo. Loving ourselves and each other?! I can think of a few Birkenstock-wearing power-gayelles who could use some tips from this font of wisdom.

And so, a new addition to this blog has been born, to vie for top place with my brainchildren Headline Porn™ and Mascot Porn™! Welcome, all, to the first outing of "Booksmut™."

It's Called Estrogen

I am a bloated, hormonal, pimply mess. I feel like a whale. I probably look like a whale. It's like I'm high school all over again, except I have to drag myself to work everyday.

This is how it always turns out. I feel fine, and like I actually lost a little, and then two weeks later - BAM. Pudge munchkin time, and my body seems to have expanded in every direction. It's that time of the darned month and I just need to finally get on the rag and pop my monthly Dolfenal, but my body's betraying me by refusing to just let go of bloat season.

I know I keep whining about being pudgy, but this is a new low. I actually feel like I can't breathe... I think I can hear the lady saying "dyspepsia 'yan!" in a bossy, know-it-all voice, and maybe I should go get the medicine for dyspepsia but I don't know what it's called and I probably will sleep it off anyway speaking of which I'm running on two hours of sleep and about two slices of pizza, which is bound to go straight to my hips again because being part of the training team turns you into a huge vacuum for food and you'll learn to just inhale everything as you jaunt from food place to food place easing stress and mental acrobatics by stuffing your mouths.

Now Playing

Duffy - Mercy

I'm liking the song, even if she does sound like she's trying to wrest Amy Winehouse off the throne she sits on.

Your Mother

Breaking!

There's going to be one additional person added to the general population of the world within the next nine months, courtesy of my old friend Arvy Ybarola. Surreal - I've known this girl since high school and now she has another human being inside her! She's always been the first to do grown-up things.

And... that's all. I just wanted to announce that to the World Wide Web.

Here's What You Can Eat for PhP36...

... at E-Diner, who jacked up their prices by Php2. I know people are starving in Mogadishu but this is ridiculous. PhP36 for this puny little serving? Upping the price AND downsizing the portions?! Scandal! This cannot be tolerated! Do not eat in E-Diner ever again! I wish I didn't have to eat there anymore but I'm a sucker for their sinigang. So I'm probably going to eat there again. And I'm probably going to hate myself for it.

Rice has been scarce, and people have been expounding on the irony so I'll skip the punditry. Food is expensive and so is gas. We've all fallen victim to the shortage, and are paying through very bloody noses just to stay alive and eat well. I wasn't surprised when establishments started jacking up the prices of their food.

In times like these, I remember whining to my mother for having only PhP5 for allowance. She in turn reminds me that they would be happy with 10 centavos back in the day. Then I wake up and have to pay for my breakfast, and it just makes me want to weep.

Achievements and Congratulations

Today I am happy to note the following:

The first ever class I handled all by my lonesome has now officially graduated! The birthing pains are over, and "Nikka's Hos" will hit the floor by tonight. Four weeks of toil, labor, castigations, laughter, ridiculousness and pizza. They will forever be my first babies. Great job, guys!


Elleser "Illi" Galleta, my best friend and proud member of the graduates of 2008 has also graduated. With honors from New York's School of Visual Arts, thankyouverymuch. He finished with a bang, part of the graduating class's Top Ten, (possibly) the only Filipino, and received an award for Fashion Photography. Dreams come true, boyfriend - go forth and conquer!


The MetroPost is a finalist in " all five categories of the weekly paper division of the Philippine Press Institute's Annual Community Press Awards." As the original home to (and willing instrument of) my original journalistic efforts, this paper will always have a place in my finicky heart. It's about time, biznatches! So amazing to finally get some recognition for the best paper in Dumaguete. The MP puts all other Dumaguete papers to shame, IMHO. No other local weekly is as well edited and laid out as the MP! Congratulations to Alex and Irma Pal for doing an awesome and amazing job.

Beachy Keen

It's here! The confirmation and photographic evidence that I am indeed one of the biggest fag hags on earth. It's an amazing honor to be surrounded by such grace and elegance!

Furthermore, in an updated beachy note - yes Dom, I heard your grumbling :) - check out some of the beach photos I was talking about. The Travel Trainers making themselves seen at the annual summer shebang. Special mention goes to my class "babies" (whom I have unofficially dubbed "Nikka's Hos") for giving me copies of the photos. Out in full force!

Beach Bunny

Spent the better part of yesterday hitting the beach with the rest of my work buddies. Yes, the annual summer outing of PeopleSupport. I ended up going because they made me. This is of course a weak and pathetic excuse - sometimes I find myself without a backbone, and I end up going because everyone goes.

Alright, fine, I wanted to. There. I said it. Scandal! Miss Nikka hits the beach after two years of studied avoidance!

I had a better time than I thought I would. It rained like a biznatch in the middle of the whole to-do though, but it wasn't so bad. There was a boatload of food (I think they were making up for the food shortage that happened at last year's Christmas Party), some fun music, and good times because the gay community was out and about!

It's always fun with the gay boys, girls and twinkies of PS. Strutting their stuff and making it rain. You know they can do it. Rain-making dances and all.

I'll write more about this when I have the time. In related news, I have finally validated the fact that I am the biggest fag hag on earth. Wait till I upload the picture of me camping it up in the middle of all the marvelously beautiful ladyboys. Coming soon!

Late

Ne-yo's "Because of You" is my soundtrack of the day. Punctual! Shame on me. I must relinquish my crown as commercially brainwashed ho-bag, because this song is so damn yesterday it's embarassing.

I don't give an eff - this song is on neverending rotation on Mnemosyne right now. For the ones who aren't in the know, and you know who you are, Mnemosyne is my little silver poddie, who is currently encased in her ultra luxe white faux-leather casing. That thing is sexier than I am. Not saying much, I know.

Further irrelevant news: I read somewhere that Ne-Yo is gay. Represent, sister! Just don't end up like Jacko! Stop channeling the Jackson. You don't want to see the music video for his "Because of You" single. You could photo-shop Michael Jackson's face on his mug, and the transformation would be complete.

I still *heart* this song today.

Stark Raving Amazing

Watched Iron Man today, my brother Luke in tow. Miss Paulie decided to grace the movie with his glittering presence as well, so it was quite the little outing.

I realized I didn't even see the trailer for this movie. I know! Unthinkable, in this day and age of YouTube and constant propaganda; I suppose I have been a little too busy these days. Still, I'd known Robert Downey, Jr. was to play Iron Man/Tony Stark; seen the leaked pictures from the movie. Never a big fan of Downey (I don't think I've ever seen him in a movie before), and I didn't like the idea that Gwyneth Paltrow was in the movie as well.

Glad I went though - it just flat-out rocked. Iron Man is now my favorite Marvel superhero movie of all time. Hands down. Downey is the hotness! The absolute hotness. And the man can act.

Luke was pleased and promptly advised me that the movie apparently stayed true to the story of Tony Stark and Iron Man. Even if I hadn't known that fact, I'd still be completely blown away. You all have to WATCH. IT. NOW!!!!

In other related news, my brother is in town for a tennis camp and will be staying for about a month. It's nice to have him around. Even if we don't see each other too often. It's debilitating, money-wise though; it's like paying double for everything I do. Like eat. But it's not everyday he's in town anyway.